No penetration before certification...ever heard that one? As an instructor, we are constantly placed on impossible, and sometimes unfounded pedestals, and if you haven't seen that dreamy look in the eyes of a student of the opposite sex, you're either Quasimodo or a completely useless teacher! I remember vividly the hopeless infatuation with my charming and charismatic Open Water instructor - he could do no wrong in my eyes, and actually is still quite a good friend, but at the time I was desperate for his attention. The same thing happened during my Rescue and Divemaster, developing crushes on the instructors, not necessarily in a sexual way, but in a geeky kid following around the cool kids at school kind of a way. My instructors on Utila were effortlessly cool in my eyes - clean living, tattooed, tall and slender, people seemed to gravitate around them in a way that they had never done to me. Strangely enough, almost none of them are still practicing instructors, which is a shame because they are all amazing teachers, but maybe that's how it works, with the 'old' generation giving way to the 'new'. They'll have to prise the regulator from my cold dead hands before that happens!!
The first time I experienced a student's 'coweyes', I was teaching a confined water session in the UK, in a local indoor swimming pool. It was a big group, maybe 8 students, and we were on a time limit, so as usual I kept my head down and got on with the work, not particularly interested in making friends. My bus was late that day, so I flounced into the pool area red faced and sweating, still in my outside clothes, to find all my students sat waiting in their bathing suits. I didn't notice the guy in question at first, other than to clock that he was wearing Speedos and seemed quite cocky. As the session continued, he in particular had a few problems with mask clearing, so I spent a bit of extra time with him under water before passing him to the Divemaster to continue practicing the skill while I finished off with the others. At the end of the session, I jumped back in the pool while everyone was dismantling their gear to pick something up, maybe some dropped weights, and noticed his eyes on me when I climbed out of the pool. He made a few cheeky comments, and I forget the banter with the passing years, but he drew a smile, I remember that much. Later on he told me that the shape of my mask made a heart around my eyes, and it was that that kept him calm underwater...charmer. About a week later, he found me on Facebook, or I found him, and we started exchanging messages. He asked me out for dinner, I accepted, and the rest, as they say, is history! We were together for a little while, eventually ending when I moved to Bahrain, and as far as I'm aware, he never dived again after finishing his Open Water, which is a shame, but not that surprising. Unfortunately a lot of students who complete their course in the UK usually just do it for a particular holiday and then give up afterwards due to lack of time and money.
So the moral of this story? To be honest, I don't really have one. I know a lot of couples in the diving industry who started as instructor and student, and are still very happy to this day. Equally I know a few instructors who unfortunately thrive on the 'power' and are well-known predators when it comes to their students. One chap used to only speak to girls a day or two before they were due to leave the island, because he knew he wouldn't have to deal with the cling-ons afterwards. I heard about an instructor couple who used to swing with their students, so you see, it takes all types. I'm not suggesting that dating your students is a bad idea, that is after all how me and Sharkboy got together, but I would recommend caution. The 'no penetration before certification' rule is a good one to live by but there is still plenty of trouble to get into before that occurs. Just like with every good relationship, get to know the person behind the mask first, because once they're out of their Speedo, all you're left with is the person, not the instructor!
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The first time I experienced a student's 'coweyes', I was teaching a confined water session in the UK, in a local indoor swimming pool. It was a big group, maybe 8 students, and we were on a time limit, so as usual I kept my head down and got on with the work, not particularly interested in making friends. My bus was late that day, so I flounced into the pool area red faced and sweating, still in my outside clothes, to find all my students sat waiting in their bathing suits. I didn't notice the guy in question at first, other than to clock that he was wearing Speedos and seemed quite cocky. As the session continued, he in particular had a few problems with mask clearing, so I spent a bit of extra time with him under water before passing him to the Divemaster to continue practicing the skill while I finished off with the others. At the end of the session, I jumped back in the pool while everyone was dismantling their gear to pick something up, maybe some dropped weights, and noticed his eyes on me when I climbed out of the pool. He made a few cheeky comments, and I forget the banter with the passing years, but he drew a smile, I remember that much. Later on he told me that the shape of my mask made a heart around my eyes, and it was that that kept him calm underwater...charmer. About a week later, he found me on Facebook, or I found him, and we started exchanging messages. He asked me out for dinner, I accepted, and the rest, as they say, is history! We were together for a little while, eventually ending when I moved to Bahrain, and as far as I'm aware, he never dived again after finishing his Open Water, which is a shame, but not that surprising. Unfortunately a lot of students who complete their course in the UK usually just do it for a particular holiday and then give up afterwards due to lack of time and money.
So the moral of this story? To be honest, I don't really have one. I know a lot of couples in the diving industry who started as instructor and student, and are still very happy to this day. Equally I know a few instructors who unfortunately thrive on the 'power' and are well-known predators when it comes to their students. One chap used to only speak to girls a day or two before they were due to leave the island, because he knew he wouldn't have to deal with the cling-ons afterwards. I heard about an instructor couple who used to swing with their students, so you see, it takes all types. I'm not suggesting that dating your students is a bad idea, that is after all how me and Sharkboy got together, but I would recommend caution. The 'no penetration before certification' rule is a good one to live by but there is still plenty of trouble to get into before that occurs. Just like with every good relationship, get to know the person behind the mask first, because once they're out of their Speedo, all you're left with is the person, not the instructor!
Join me on Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/adventuresofadivinginstructor
Clean living..really..all of them ;) Bx
ReplyDeleteHaha, fair enough Bex, maybe not all of them :)xx
ReplyDelete